There are few worse feelings than the one you have when you say something intended to be funny and get silence instead of laughter. For comics, this is especially true. Some jokes simply aren’t for everyone. But certain things are universally funny. Here are five of them guaranteed to amuse:
Whether it’s a special guest speaker or a preview of the upcoming school play, something always goes wrong. And when what was supposed to be educational enrichment dissolves into nonsense, watching your teachers scramble to make something meaningful and worthwhile out of it is great entertainment. So sit back and enjoy the show. No, the real show, which is the absolute dumpster fire burning before your very eyes.
Being Scolded in Public
Sure, this can also be embarrassing. But embarrassment, oddly enough, tends to make people laugh. Besides, how often do you see someone just go off in public over something that actually matters? Not often. What infuriates them can seem to calmer observers totally trivial and inherently inconsequential. Therefore the reaction itself is comically disproportionate. Angry people don’t usually express their anger too coherently, either. Sometimes just hearing someone fumble a few curse words is enough to get a laugh.
This is funny simply because it’s awkward. And it’s awkward to get that close to total strangers. It’s awkward that some of them are seated and some of them are standing because inevitably someone’s face is in someone else’s crotch and others end up wrapping their legs around poles not for tips but for injury prevention. Throw in all the bizarre fashion statements, unsolicited music performances, and private conversations you couldn’t help but overhear, and it’s hard not to at least crack a smile when you finally have the room to breathe.
Not when you need it, because then it’s no laughing matter. But just in general, the concept of customer service is laughable. There are people who make a living out of pretending to care about the quality of your experience with their company. Imagine that! And how do they all suck at it? How droll!
The Faces We Make Just Before Sneezing
Some of us look terrified, unsure of exactly how or why our bodies are deceiving us. Others look downright disgusted, fully aware of the horror to come. Either way, these have to be the least glamorous moments in any of our lives, and yet we prolong them with our distorted facial expressions for all in our vicinity to see.
There is nothing in this world that brings us more happiness than watching someone fall. This is especially true when their confidence level is high- talk about being brought back down to reality. Tripping and bumping into things can also be included in this category. Part of what makes this so funny is watching the person’s reaction and their attempt to play it off after the fact. Watch your step, girl.
Eating Snacks In A Quiet Room
This is when you are in a quiet room. It could be a movie theater or conference room or church for some reason (or basically anywhere with a somewhat serious atmosphere) and then someone disrupts it all by slowly opening a bag of chips. From there on out, every single movement of that bag is heard, making whatever stupid sentence coming out of Mike’s mouth seem a little less important.
P.S. A drink with a plastic lid and straw squeaking also works.
Sometimes you witness something so completely awkward that all you can do is laugh. Oh, your cat broke its legs and needs a series of casts? That’s hilarious. You found out that your child hates you? We’re dead. Look, sometimes we can’t be held accountable for our uncontrollable laughter and this is absolutely one of those times. If you want us to stop laughing, stop making terrible decisions in life.
This one throws everyone off. Everything was running smoothly until someone messed up. It gets even better when the stakes are higher like when making dinner or handling something valuable. Oh, you were one step away from finishing baking that cake? Guess what? Now it’s on the floor and so are we from laughing.
This one is great because it usually takes place during a serious conversation at a restaurant. A friend in crisis will be pouring their heart out and then all of the sudden the entire thing is ruined by some piece of sh** who can’t figure out where their straw went. Hint: it’s in your f****** glass, Tiffany.